Places where reality is a bit altered:

tootsie-roll-frankenstein:

• any target
• churches in texas
• abandoned 7/11’s
• your bedroom at 5 am
• hospitals at midnight
• warehouses that smell like dust
• lighthouses with lights that don’t work anymore
• empty parking lots
• ponds and lakes in suburban neighborhoods
• rooftops in the early morning
• inside a dark cabinet

sneeking:

ezekiel-was-calm-and-quiet:

ruschiae:

a list of sounds

• high heels clacking on the marble tiles of a church
• a soda can being opened
• a plastic-covered library book being pressed flat, crunching the binding
• a marble rolling on a wooden floor
• wood popping and crackling as it burns

oh my god

I’m cleansed

sandandglass:

sandandglass:

sandandglass:

sandandglass:

sandandglass:

Currently watching: Running Wild with Bear Grylls feat. Barack Obama

Kind of hoping to see Obama take a shit in the woods. I mean, that would be interesting television.

Obama basically wants to run into the woods to avoid the annoying Secret Service guys he is stuck with constantly. Be free Mr President!

Obama in the woods coming at you. Gonna eat some old fish left on the ground.

He’s super jazzed he doesn’t have to wear a suit

And just in case you were wondering, IT’S ALL ABOUT CLIMATE CHANGE WHAAAT? You do your thing Mr Obama. That glacier is looking fucked.

Bear: “Do you know when bears are most dangerous?”

Obama: “When’s that?”

Bear: “If you surprise them fornicating.”

Obama: “I think that’s probably true for humans as well.”

Obama’s face when Bear is like “I’m gonna cook you some lunch.”

Apparently there are snipers dotted through the hills and they are cramping Bear’s style.

#selfie #besties #life #adventure #nature #wanderlust

Obama is just like your dad – he has no idea how to use a phone

Obama ain’t too sure about his lunch

Obama: “Let’s face it. The camera man’s got the toughest job, Bear.”

It’s actually just two dads hanging out talking about dad stuff

“Bear, you’re a terrible cook.”

“It seems to be that Bear’s main claim to fame is drinking his own urine.” Watching you Bear.

Omfg Bear wants Obama to autograph this Obama bottle opener

Bear: “You have abs.”

Obama: “I’m pretty cut.”

Bro hug

gogu:

afuckingmosasaurus:

gogu:

half gun; half car

tank

blocked

sadtit:

hey is anyone interested in Treating Me Right it’s free.  it doesn’t cost anything

whitelivesdontmatter:

him: hey :)
me: you’re lying

michichans:

non-lip kisses are my absolute favorite. absentmindedly kissing the back of someone’s palm as you hold hands. chaste forehead kisses and brushes against their cheek. silly boops on the nose. kissing fluttering eyelashes. neck kisses that barely touch skin but are no less passionate. kisses on collar bones or exposed tummies. sloppy kisses at the corners of someone’s mouth. kissing each and every fingertip with a delicate touch.

heavyflirtysoul:

itsstuckyinmyhead:

Why five page essay? What about 0 page essay

(-5) page essay. You write to me Proffesor. I’m in control now.